Monday, November 21, 2011

Holiday Angst.

I'm feeling irritable. I'm feeling impatient. 

I really thought that with my religious epiphany this past summer, I would enter into the Christmas season a little calmer.  But today I found myself feeling not so calm.  True, it may be all of hullabaloo surrounding my workplace, my Alma mater and the nonstop regurgitating of the same old not-so-new news.  It may be the dreary weather.  It may be the fact that I've traveled a lot the past few months which I've really enjoyed, but always puts me off kilter. I'm not sure.  Maybe I need just a little more good news in my life - I think we all do.
 
There are so many things to enjoy and love.  Way more good things in my life than bad.  It really seems rather masochistic to listen to the news.  I gave up Walmart because I didn't like the affect it had on me or the affect I believe it has on society as a whole.  Why not give up on the news?  I really don't think that my world would stop turning if I no longer tuned into the morning news or read the newspaper.  At almost 50 years old, I have a fairly good understanding of what my role is as a human in the human race.  The 10 commandments have given me that information.

 There are some good websites out there if I'm so inclined to see some of the good going on in the world - http://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/



I subscribe to several online groups that relate to my own quirky interests and I pick up bits and pieces of the world's goings-on through that. 

Blogs that I follow also are likely to include a more humanistic view of the world so I won't be totally in the dark.  And of course there is my church family.....anything that is worth knowing is discussed at our weekly family meals. 

So my gift to myself - which will hopefully affect my family - is to live in my own sheltered little world.  That may not work for many people and I respect that.  But I want to truly enjoy Christmas and all the days leading up to it in the manner in which I believe it should be enjoyed: without the anxiety and worry and rushing here and there and trying to get more and more and more done. 

Although for many, many years I've said that I was a Christian, this is the very first year that I understand why I am Christian.  It is hard to explain but this is the very first year that Christ's birth is a true event for me and not just a token day that I am celebrating and I will be celebrating with all of my heart! 

And instead of freaking out over things about which I can do nothing, I will rejoice in the true gifts in life.

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