Am I a ghost? Over the past several months I've been thinking about my place in this world. I've questioned that many times over the years - what is my place, do I even deserve a place. One thing about working at a large University is that one is constantly surrounded by so many people doing grandiose things for humanity. Everywhere I look, there is someone better, someone smarter, someone who reads more, someone who is more in tune with the struggles of the world. Then I look at myself and think 'wow, I've babied a duck who was hit by a car'. Ugh.
I really do want to help......everyone! I want to help people who are abused and unwanted and discriminated against. I want to help everyone who has been negatively affected by the political debacle. I want to do so much but really? Some days it is all I can do to get out of bed. Some days it is all I can do to leave my office and go home. But what I can do on my good days is to smile and be kind to everyone I meet regardless of who they are. Maybe sharing some simple kindness is all that humanity needs - regardless of who they are. I'm thinking that may be some orange-skinned, crazy-hair old man wouldn't be so hateful if a few people had been kinder to him when he was a boy.
I know how I feel when I try to be friendly and am ignored. I remind myself that I don't want to be someone who makes other people feel unworthy and invisible. A smile may not cure all the world's problems but it's a start. And that duck? I think I've mattered to her. She's walking again.