Sunday, May 29, 2011

Happy Birthday!


Buddy
This past weekend we celebrated 3 birthdays.  I can't believe my kids are 28, 24, 14, 14, and 12 (it was the 14 year olds and 12 year old birthdays we celebrated this weekend).  One thing I've learned from having a gap of 10 years between kids is to not wish the time away.  I can remember when my oldest were young - wishing for the days I would be able to sleep more than 4 hours at a stretch, longing for the time when I didn't have to change diapers, act as a chauffeur, deal with a mountain of laundry every day of the week.
Jordan enjoying her Nookbook

Now. . . I know those days will come.  And I'm not looking forward to it. At all.  Sure, I'm tired after working all day and then having to run kids here and there.  But what will I do when there is no soccer practice or band concerts or 4H meetings?  This year was my son's very last elementary school music concert and I could barely control the tears streaming down my face the entire time.
Ikey - just being Ikey;

Sometimes I would rather kick back and read a book than drive the kids one more place.  But I know that there will soon be a day that they will be driving themselves.  I have nightmares about that day. 

There have been times when I haven't listened attentively when one of my children was recounting the details of a dream.  And I know that 5 years from now, I would sell my soul to get those types of discussion back.
Haley riding her new horse, Buddy;
I'm lucky.  My kids will cuddle with me.  They still enjoy 'mom-time' and a trip to get an ice cream cone is still considered a special treat (or at least they let me believe it is).  I don't want these days to end.  But yet every May 27th and 28th (and October14 and December 27th), we celebrate the progression of another year.  It is nothing to celebrate.  I need a few more days or months or years to thoroughly and completely enjoy my kids.  I want my kids - all of my kids - to stay where they are right now.  I don't want my oldest son to move to the opposite side of the country, don't want my daughter and grandson to move six more hours away, don't want my kids to drive.  I want things to stay the same.  But they can't and they won't.  So I will enjoy what is now and not wish for tomorrow.  Because tomorrow will come whether I am ready or not.  And I am not.
Home - where I want them all to stay.